OK, so the time has finally come for the review of Five Guys, and while I don’t want to create a false impression, I believe that if it’s good enough for this bloke (over there —->) then it’s sure as hell good enough for me!!! (Just in case you were wondering, this isn’t President Obama in Cardiff)…
Chippy Ally (the ultimate take away experience) has got a hell of an upgrade with Five Guys opening and the ‘restaurant’ doesn’t feel crowded with plenty of seating and potato walkways (feel free to ask) guiding people through to the ordering counter. Along with the complementary nuts for everyone to nibble on while they’re waiting, this really is pleasant place to be.
Anyway, the initial talk amongst the bros was mainly around the presidential pricing and rumour that the franchise have simply dropped the dollar for a pound sign. So, lets assume that’s the case for a second and let me tell you that at today’s (Star Wars Day) exchange rate my $13.05 burger and shake comes in at a meagre £8.63; but alas, I’m a man with a pocket of coloured queens, rather than a series of dead presidents so I parted with £13.05.
I will let you into a secret at this point though; some 20 hours before this trip I had experienced my first Five Guys, but while on a drunken stag-do no real review could’ve come from it, but it did set me up with the knowledge that spending over 13 quid on a burger and shake (no fries people, but I’ll get to that) in here wasn’t such a bad thing!
So before I go into my burger, here’s how the burger creation works:
- You pick a burger, cheeseburger, or bacon cheeseburger
- Followed by your choice of toppings:
- Then it’s the somewhat standard choice of extra cheese, bacon, or patties with the perhaps slightly less familiar choice of whether or not you want a bun. I’d love to see someone go “All the Way” and then not have it all held together by a bun!
- There’s then a lot of hollering and shouting, but simple order numbering doesn’t make this too taxing. Just be prepared to wait 5 minutes or so.
- After this it becomes more fun assuming you’ll order a drink; unlimited refills of over 100 different Coca Cola made beverages – I’ve tried Cherry Vanilla Coke Zero and it gets a thumbs up from me; I reckon grape Sprite, or peach Fanta may be a good way forward next time. – And then there’s the milkshake, and “OH MY DAYS” what a treat they are!!!
- Sort out all this, take a seat and enjoy!!!
Now for the bit you’ve all been waiting for – my burger: which came with 2 patties (standard unless you go for the small version) cheese, bacon, lettuce, grilled onions, jalapeño peppers, ketchup and mayo. In a nutshell, this is one of my favourite burgers ever; I’ve never been too much of a burger snob, and while I have a lot of time for the gourmet stuff, sometimes your fast food joint is the craving we’re after when a burger springs to mind; and if you can alleviate ill feelings towards the price at Five Guys then I don’t see any reason to ever step inside a McDonalds or Burger King again!!!
The burgers are really moist and hold together really well, the cheese is your typical American style stuff, but does seem to be more flavoursome than any I’ve had before. The bacon is delightfully crispy and again holds a great flavour that really adds a kick of awesome flavour. All this is wonderfully complimented by my choice of toppings and the jalapeños gave the extra kick I often desire, yet didn’t over power any of the other flavours I was hankering for from the onions, mayo/ketchup mix, cheese or bacon. A regular bread bun that holds together well, while also soaking up the juices makes this an enjoyable burger that’s doesn’t leave you needing a bib or a shower afterwards.
Now it’s time for the shake and fries: I opted for a single flavour vanilla shake (multiple mixtures of the below are on offer) and not to overstate things too much, I cannot remember having a better milkshake anywhere else, ever! Rather than describe just how perfect this shake was, just think of everything you’d want from a milkshake, go to Five Guys and experience it 🙂 and don’t shy away from having it topped with whipped cream, because there’s a lot of whipped cream.
- Malted Milk
- Oreo Cookies
- Peanut Butter
- Salted Caramel
And one final twist to the milkshake – all are available with added bacon… “Oink” “Oink”
So last but not least, the Five Guys fries, all with a hint of healthiness (sort of) as these are fried in peanut oil and thus boast no cholesterol. It’s with the mindset that these must be healthy as the small portion is arguably the size of 2 or 3 McDonalds’ large fries, so rather than order them for yourself, just eat the person’s fries next to you, they’ll only end up offering them out anyway!!! The important bit, they taste great and a Cajun version is also available if you want to make your eyes water at any point? And take it from me, make sure you don’t wipe your eyes while they’re covered in Cajun anything… #Burn
Just to wrap things up, Five Guys also offer hot dogs and grilled sandwiches, and there will be a time and place to eat one and possibly a blog somewhere to read about them, but here that is not!
That’s about all I’ve got on this latest (solo) burger bro adventure and I wait with anticipation to see how my fellow bros felt about what is now (probably) my favourite burger place in Cardiff.
My Five Guys burger gets a 4.7/5, but the whole experience gets a massive 5, one for each guy!!!
“All the Way” – This is a big help for anyone who’s struggling to make up their mind: simply say “All the Way” and you’ll be getting a burger with lettuce, tomato, pickles, grilled onions, grilled mushrooms, ketchup, mustard and mayo.